Updating your status (quo) July 21, 2009

Welcome to the Twitter Nation

We’ve become a nation of Tweeters. We update the world on our every move in 140 characters or less. Welcome to the Twitter Nation.

April 15, 2009. That marks the day I officially became a tweeter. Originally, I joined because I wanted another gimmick to get readers to my site. You see, the folks at wordpress understood the draw, and gave us bloggers the ability to add our twitter updates to a side bar on our pages. Just look to your right at the “all-a-twitter” box to see for yourself. I thought it would be a nifty way for people to find something new on my site even if I hadn’t updated a full blog post yet.

The problem? I began ignoring my blog and got sucked into instant twits. The attraction is strong, you see. I can update my facebook status, my blog sidebar, and my twitter account, all with one simple text message from my cell phone, and in less than 30 seconds usually. Writing a decent blog entry from start to publish takes me at least 120 thirty-second intervals. That’s a lot of tweets.

The other problem is that I’ve found I’m losing my ability to write anything decent in longer than 140 characters. I start running into problems after the first paragraph, then get all flustered and end up trashing the entire idea. It’s like the worst case of creative block ever. And I’m not the only one having this problem, all thanks to twitter. John Mayer is a tweeter I follow, and he mentioned it’s actually affecting his ability to write songs. He publicly stated in a recent tweet that he’s now making an effort to cut back on his updates; to which I sorely miss, as his tweets are always entertaining. (Check him out at twitter.com/johncmayer)

Perhaps it’s becoming an international paradigm shift. But if this is true, twitter is not completely to blame. It’s the internet in general. Since the invention of comment threads to articles, discussion forums and social networking (yes, beloved facebook included), people have slowly been shortening their thoughts into smaller and smaller constructs. Looking back, my most visceral writing cannot be found within this blog, but rather splattered upon the pages of journals that I’ve kept over the years. Sadly, I haven’t touched my journal since early summer of 2008 when I apologized to it for my lack of attention due to the seduction of the blogging world.

What’s worse, any self-respecting, non-pseudonym-using blogger can tell you most of what you read is quite censored. We have to keep in mind that people we actually care about read these things, such as our mothers, friends, boyfriends (including here the ex- and potential- ones), maybe even our employers or coworkers. Names are removed, our raw internal reactions to real life interactions are toned down, our deepest desires remain masked by fancy verbiage, and all in all a less than honest interpretation of reality.  We have to be careful what we put out there for the entire world to read. And trust me, that takes a bit of work and couth.

So maybe thats why people like twitter so much- its like mobile blogging, only easier. How many people can you piss off in so few words? (Note: that is not a dare folks, I’m sure you can piss off a lot of people in a few words. Just ask Perez Hilton- twitter.com/perezhilton). But it seems like the norm has become “if you can’t say it in less than 140 characters, it ain’t worth saying”. One fellow tweeter, who has recently gained some notoriety for his ability, actually writes entire stories within those character limits (see for yourself at twitter.com/astoryin140).

Even now I’m finding it difficult to put together an entire blog post. My mind keeps thinking of a few short sentences that sound really great; filling the spaces between is what’s causing me some trouble. Maybe I should just acquiesce and simmer this entire post down to 140 characters:

I blame twitter for stifling creativity & keeping us from expressing any stimulating thought unless it fits within 140 chars. Go articulate!

One hundred forty exactly, peoples. That’s sad.

And now, a word from our representative June 6, 2009

A personality quirk. A woman’s jealous nature. An uncontrollable bodily function. You’re 45, and when alone you sing along with Avril Lavigne songs. You live a double life as a raging, yet functional, alcoholic. A man’s desire to wear women’s undergarments.

What do all six of these things have in common?

They are all parts of who you are that you wouldn’t dare share with someone the first time you meet them.

Many moons ago, a friend and I had an in depth conversation about the psychology of getting to know someone. It’s a general rule of  thumb that if you want someone to greet you with a smile the next time you see them, there are certain things you just don’t talk about. She coined this withholding of self, “presenting your Representative“.

Your representative is the one who looks out for your behalf, and knows it’s best that the other person isn’t left thinking to themselves, “ok, that was TMI (too much information)”. You may be dying on the inside to tell the other person that you can only get off sexually when you dress up in full body animal costumes (a real fetish, known as being a Furry), but your Representative knows better. Your Representative may hint at the issue in an attempt to feel out the other for similar interests, asking questions such as “Have you ever heard of Furry Fandom? What do you think of those people?”, or “I have a strange fascination with mascots, isn’t that funny?” Your Representative knows this is a much safer way to approach the issue than blurting out, “It would be really hot if we went back to my place, dressed up like the Easter Bunny and made out for a while”.

As for a more personal example, on a first date (or third for that matter) I would never discuss that I choose not to wash my hands very often because I’m a fan of “exposure”, and I think that such hygiene habits directly correlate to the fact that I don’t get sick very often. If the topic came up, I may say instead, “I have some unique idiosyncrasies when it comes to hygiene”, and leave it at that. This is my Representative in her full effect. It may leave some question marks in the other person’s mind, but at least they are still willing to caress my hand at the end of the evening.

Now, there is one exception to this rule. If you feel good vibes are being reciprocated and the two of you are jiving a bit, you can get away with sharing some of your more tame eccentricities by using the old familiar line, “This isn’t something you usually tell someone the first time you meet them but…”. Generally this gives the other person a chance to mentally prepare for what’s coming next, and tells them you know what you are about to share isn’t the most socially flattering, but you feel you can trust them not to freak out upon delivery of this forthcoming information. 

So how long exactly does it take for you to let your representative withdrawal into the background a bit and let more of your true self come forward? I wish I had an exact timeline for all you closet Furries out there, but in my personal experience it seems to all depend on the two people. There have been times I’ve felt comfortable upon first meeting admitting I own a small arsenal of panties, which allows me to get away with not doing laundry for over a month, yet I only own one or two pairs of jeans that I regularly wear (you do the math on that one, folks). Then other times, it may take a half dozen or so times before I’m willing to share that I lived on a hippie commune at the tender age of 18 months, and that during that period of time my name was Atma Kaur. I would simply suggest that you let your Representative and inner misfit confer on the decision, and let those oddities out when your gut tells you the time is right. And if by chance the person gets up, splashes their drink in your face and promptly walks out- you know it wasn’t meant to be anyway.

I encourage you all to let your inner freak fly, just consult with your Representative first.

Now please excuse me while I go dance around my living room to Hank Williams Jr, wearing nothing but a smock and a ski mask.

Quote of the Day March 24, 2009

“Taking money from the government is like living with your mother-in-law. You lose a great deal of your freedom”.

 

Art, from the NY Stock Exchange, whose last name I didn’t catch. He was speaking on Good Morning America about companies taking money from the gov’t bail outs, and the related consequences. Since he said this within the first 5 – 7 mins of my waking this morning, I am lucky to be able to remember it at all. But I did, and it made me laugh pretty hard. You can’t ask for much more of your early morning.

Quote of the day March 18, 2009

“It’s kinda like the morning after a one night stand… What do we say to each other now?”

 

Me, to a fellow juror, on our way out of the building. We had been instructed by the judge to cease all conversations related to the case until we reconvene tomorrow morning. But after two full days of testimony, and only an hour of initial (and unresolved) deliberations, it was the only thing we could think about. And, lest we forget, the only thing all twelve of us have in common.

On the ebb, the flow and the in between February 21, 2009

I love metaphors because they allow me, as a writer, to express mental concepts in a way more powerful and colorful than a straightforward explanation of ideas. They are also a bit more personalized to the individual reader than just me blabbing on and on about my own musings. It allows you, as the reader, to take something unique away from the article.

That being said, let’s talk about the tides (of life):

There’s no denying it: things are always changing. Fighting the change only makes it harder in the end. Ever try to swim against the current? It’s really exhausting. It leaves you breathless, tired and longing for the trusted and sturdy shores. But what we must realize is that in actuality, there is no shore off in the distance. You are, and always will be, forever riding the ebbs and the flows of the tides.

So how then, do you account for those times when things seem to be relatively calm? When there’s no change apparent, no dramatic shift in the status quo? Let me introduce you to the slack tide.

Slack tide is when, during the high or low tide, the water reaches it’s apotheosis and remains at a certain level for a period of time. Slack tide is the shortest phase of the tidal current, generally lasting between one and three hours. This is the time to relax, float on your back, splash and play in the still waters, and swim in any direction and manner you please. This time is calm and lacking any real current characteristics; it appears that the slack tide is the gentle and autonomous waters between high and low. But in truth, it belongs to one of the extremes. Whether a high or a low, it is all still part of the eternal flux.  

When the tide begins to move back out, it is called the turning tide. The comfortable waters stir and the tide changes. High goes out as the low comes in, or vice versa, and you are caught up in the shift, feeling perhaps a bit displaced. This is generally the longest period of the tidal cycle, and when the most waves occur. No matter if you were caught off guard or saw it coming miles away, this is the time when you either chose to surf the waves, or let them crash harshly upon you head. 

 

What will you choose?

So why be aware of the tides and the shifts if everything is just going to change according to it’s own schedule anyway?

 

Because it is important to enjoy the still waters for the freedom they allow you, whether be a high or a low, to be able to choose the course of your journey. Take this time to accept things as they are. Put up your feet and take a break if you need to, or use this time to plan for your next trajectory. But remember, this time will not last long, so use it wisely. 

And when the tides inevitably change, be aware that things are going to feel a bit off kilter and out of your control, but ultimately you have the ability to choose how you will deal with the waves as they approach. You control whether you sink or swim.

While you cannot control that things will always change, you can certainly determine the manner in which you traverse those changes.

Quote of the Day February 20, 2009

“Men are weird. They have this weird…. men behavior.“

A fellow female coworker, verbalizing her thoughts about men, during a conversation about relationships and not understanding the actions of the opposite sex.

I laughed pretty hard about this one. She was totally serious, and in the moment it made perfect sense. I hope it speaks to you all too.

Observation of the Day December 16, 2008

Why is it that you can’t put metal in the microwave, when the inside of the microwave itself is made of metal?

 

Interested in the answer? Because I care about you all, and I know you are just dying to find out:

CLICK HERE!

Inspired by a frog December 11, 2008

While leisurely sinking into the abyss

Will you even notice

That something is amiss?

An original poem, inspired by Boiling Frog allegory. Click here to learn more about the Boiling Frog.

I don’t know what made me think of this, it just kinda popped into my head on the way home today. Thought it was noteworthy.

Mind Games- Come play with me! December 8, 2008

There are two things about me that I feel are fairly evident once you get to know me.

1. I’m pretty dorky

2. I’m constantly thinking about 8 things at once.

So what do these two things have to do with the price of rice in China, you ask? Well, I have this little game that I like to play with myself; it doesn’t have a name, but it’s easy to play… you just have to put on your thinking caps. 

So here’s what you do: Think of an everyday product that while it has a generic name, it is more commonly known by it’s brand name.

Here’s a few examples:

Kleenex- facial tissues

Windex- window and/or hard surface cleaner

Vaseline- petroleum jelly

Band Aid- adhesive bandage

Aspirin/Motrin/Tylenol- Acetylsalicylic acid tablets/Ibuprofen/Acetaminophen

Q-Tip – cotton swab

And that’s just naming a few. I have thought of tons of these, and my pride wants to list them all, but that would ruin the fun. Instead, I want to see just how many you all out there can think of! And there are some really good ones out there. Ones you never even realized were actual brand names. 

And please- NO CHEATING! I’m not the first to play this “game”, and there are plenty of web sites out there with lots of answers nicely laid out for you, but what’s the fun in that?? Trust me, you’ll feel a whole heck of a lot of more observant once you start. In fact, you won’t be able to stop thinking about it each time you encounter a brand name product. You’ll be on the lookout for these things everywhere. It can become a sickness it you aren’t careful.

So what are you waiting for? Hit the Reply button and lay ‘em on me!

Masticate on this! October 6, 2008

“The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president. You realize that you control your own destiny.” -Alert Ellis

 

 Do you think this is true?

 If so, why?

 If you disagree, what brings you to that conclusion?

 What are the examples in your life to prove/disprove this statement?