Snapshots of a… Crazy Kinda Life

The Misadventures of Messie Jessie

Still Bloggin’, Still Pimpin’: Pimp UR Blog, Episode 2 NOW AVAILABLE! May 21, 2012

Hey guys, remember that time I (co)wrote and (co)published an ebook? That was pretty awesome. Know what’s more awesome? Doing it a second time.

That’s right, Pimp UR Blog has released its second episode: Increase Search Results with Articles and Feeds!

Need a refresher on this ebook I speak of? Click HERE to learn more.

Episode Two starts with a discussion on aspects of engaging an audience. We then cover all sorts of crazy technical details of the software we use, which examines the interaction between blog technologies and social media produce Google search results. It’s our computer-savvy, techie-geekish episode of the series, but if that’s your thing this is the book for you.

You could also buy it because you love my blog and want to read some totally amazing stuff I wrote about blogging.

Pimp ur Blog Episode Two: Increase Search Results with Articles and Feeds, like the first $.99 eBook in the Pimp ur Blog series, Pimp ur Blog Episode One: Boost Search Results with Social Bookmarking, will be available from Amazon, Barnes & Noble, iTunes, Smashwords, Goodreads, and multiple other e-reader and online eBook websites.

Click HERE to get your copy now!


While you’re supporting the ebook, don’t forget to support the original when you Rate, Comment, Subscribe, Share!

Got questions about the book that I didn’t answer here? Shoot me a line at I tell you all you want to know… and more.


Guess Who Wrote A Book?: Pimp ur Blog, yo March 21, 2012

That’s right, Messie Jessie has coauthored an eBook: Pimp ur Blog! Click here to visit the book’s website to learn more about it.

(Yes, my book has its own website. It spent many a tireless night perfecting the content, layout and design. I’m not sure how my book did this without any hands, but whatever, I think my book did a good job.)

“What’s an eBook?” you ask? Well, an eBook is pretty much exactly the same as a bound-paper book, except there is no bound paper. In fact, there’s no paper at all. EBooks download to your computer and other electronic devices for environmentally friendly reading. And they’re cheaper too: my eBook is only .99 cents per episode. $4.95 for the whole thing. Plus, there’s the whole instant gratification factor. Have you already decided you want the book? Just click this sentence, then click “Buy Now” and in less than a minute, it’s yours!

Now, in honor of full disclosure, I wrote only a small portion of the book and I know pretty much nothing on the actual topic. My assignment was to about my favorite topic: me! The majority of the authorship credit goes to Paul Rice who blogs at and Paul is one of my readers and used my blog as a guinea pig for his search-results-boosting hypothesis.

Turns out Paul knew what he was doing because it worked– my search results tripled almost immediately! You should totally visit his site and drop him a comment telling him all about how awesome his eBook is. Then head over to Twitter and follow him at @GettingWell4 so you can continue to wade in the wake of his awesomeness.

In closing, the following words are probably the most awesome to ever appear on this CrazyKindaLife website: BUY OUR EBOOK. On Amazon. 



In the spirit of continued awesomeness: Rate, Comment, Subscribe, Share! AND BUY!

And email! Copious compliments now accepted.


Ok Universe, message received. May 19, 2011

While sitting here eating my 2.5-quarts-of-popcorn and 1-pint-of-milk dinner, I decided I wanted to tell you about the exact moment in my life that I hit bottom.

2.5 quarts of popcorn will tend to do that to a person. Not so much the pint of milk.

It was March 14th, 2008, approximately 9 o’clock pm. I had no job, $50 to my name, a backpack of belongings over my shoulder, and now, rendered officially homeless as well. I watched the person who had dropped me off drive away, never once looking back, as I waited for the person whose front stoop I was standing on to come to the door, hoping she would take me in.

That one singular moment is forever etched into my memory.

The how’s and why’s of the situation aren’t really relevant to this blog post. What I will say is that immediately after, I did what any other 20-something does when they find themselves in destitute: I called my mommy.

A few weeks later, on the way to pick up the rest of my belongings that a friend had allowed me to store at their house until I had somewhere to put them, my mom said something that will also be forever etched into my memory banks. These were her exact words:

“The thing is, the Universe will always tell you when you’re not doing the right thing. And if you ignore it for too long, it will bang you on the head and force you to listen.”

That simple statement had pretty much summed up the entire past eleven months of my life.


So what exactly do I mean when I say “the Universe”?

The best way I can explain it is this: some people call it “God”, some call it “Allah”, and some Atheists out there probably refer to it as a “FGE” (*bleeping* Grow Experience).

I tend to think of it as a nonsingular, amorphous energy source of undetermined origin, more easily referred to as the Universe. The Universe is you, it is me, it is our intentions and our energies that we send to, and receive from, each other. This nonsingular, amorphous energy source of undetermined origin collects all these intentions and orchestrates them into a symphony called life. We just need to tune our radios to the right station to pick up its message.

I often do what I call “putting it out there to the Universe”, which simply means making public my intentions and/or desires. The Universe usually responds by manifesting opportunities, to which I just need pay close enough attention.

The Universe doesn’t give you a set of commandments or rules. All it asks is that you try to live the most personally sincere and benevolent life possible. The Universe will always allow you to make your own choices and decisions. It will, however, give you pointers along the way.

And, as my mother so eloquently stated, if you don’t listen, it will knock you upside the head and force you to make some serious changes.


Needless to say, in 2008 I took my cue from the Universe and have since moved on, and upward, with my life. Because I’m sure no one out there wants a play-by-play of the last three years, let’s just fast forward to the meat and potatoes of this post, which started two weeks ago. I will do my best to be brief, but thorough.

A new position became available at my place of employment. It was suggested to me by a reliable authority that I should submit my resume. Initially I was hesitant; I wasn’t really interested in the job. However, I was persuaded when it was implied that I could do so “just to find out more about the position.”

Little did I know, or expect, that submitting my resume would ignite a course of events that two weeks later would result in me crying at the bus stop on the corner of 68th & Broad.

But I get ahead of myself. Let me back up just a little.

You see, I was told the position was mine if I wanted it even before the interview. It was made clear that, as far as my career was concerned, this would be a very smart decision and would assist in upward movement in the future. However, I had other career ideas in mind. Promptly after the interview I set an appointment with our CEO for the following Wednesday to discuss these ideas and how taking this position would influence the potential for these ideas to become a reality. I announced I would inform everyone of my decision after this meeting.

I had about 5 days before this meeting to think about my decision. Even though I didn’t want the job, I knew I should take it. I also thought about the other plans, projects and possibilities in my personal life that I have had on the back burner for a little while now and have recently become open to pursuing. I felt if I took the job I would be pigeon-holed in a direction I didn’t want to go in. I thought that my life would start to be more about my job than it would be about… living it. I began to feel smothered by it all. Things were moving much faster than I was ready for, and were quickly getting out of control. I had put balls in motion that I now wished I never started rolling in the first place.

Enter Wednesday. To me, this was the day the trajectory of my life was to be determined. It was a Robert Frost “Road Not Taken” kind of day. During the hour-long ride I geared myself up, thinking about what I wanted to say and exactly how I was going to say it. Anxiety was high, but I was prepared and confident. This was going to be a pivotal moment in my life, and there I was, about to step knee deep into it.

Ten minutes before I was due to arrive I get a telephone call that the meeting was cancelled. Apparently there had been a mix-up and the CEO was already booked. There were no times available later in the day.

My first reaction: anger. My second reaction: rejection. My third reaction: “screw this, I’m quitting. Clearly I’m not appreciated around this joint.”

As I passed the stop I would have gotten off of at, I decided to wait and get off a block away. I was too embarrassed to be seen by any other employees. I crossed the street to wait for the next bus in the opposite direction. Then I started to cry.

I didn’t even know why exactly I was so upset. I just was. I thought to myself, “clearly the Universe is trying to tell me something right now, I just can’t figure out what the hell it is.”

Then I cried a little more. Actually, that’s a lie. I cried pretty much the entire ride back, keeping my shades over my eyes (even on the subway) and covering my mouth with my hand, trying my best to look pensive rather than revealing that my bottom lip was quivering.

Somewhere around the mid-point of my travels, I realized what the Universe was telling me: I had been waiting for someone else (namely, the CEO) to tell me what decision to make, when what I really needed to do was make that decision for myself. Additionally, the Universe was giving me the opportunity to stop some of those balls from rolling and get things back under control.

Message received. 2008 lesson learned.

When I got back to my office, I let everyone know that I had decided not to take the position. I stated it was for personal reasons and that I was well aware that this was not looked highly upon. I also said I understood the potential consequences that this may have for future advancement in my career.

And I, I chose the road less traveled by.

I thought perhaps later I would regret this decision, but in truth, I didn’t. And you know what? I still don’t. I made the decision that I felt was best for me, no matter the repercussions.

I think that’s exactly what the Universe was hoping I’d do.

Oh yeah, and remember those things I said had been on the back burner for a while? I’ve since been “putting them out there to the universe”, and I’m hoping to catch whatever the gets thrown my way.

So, now, if you’ve made it this far (and aren’t bored to tears), what’s the take home message in all this? Put it out there; be willing to listen; let it manifest; make your own choices.

And may the Universe never bang you on the head.



Breathe. April 22, 2009

Filed under: Working hard or hardly working — Messie Jessie @ 9:15 pm
Tags: , , ,

breatheI apologize for my blogging absence.

Once again, we are preparing for another inspection at my wonderful place of employment. These seemingly never-ending inspections have drained me of any deep thought, introspective wisdom, or quick witted quips. 

After working 10+ hours (with no break) nearly every day, by the time I trudge home I find it difficult to muster the energy to do just about anything. If food finds its way into my mouth, and my hair somehow gets clean, I consider myself lucky.

All these inspections are normal in my line of work; it just so happens the entities-that-be unknowingly scheduled themselves back to back. While looking over charts with my boss today, he said to me, “Don’t you feel like you’ve been preparing for inspection for the last six months of your life”?

I looked at him, with weary eyes, responding, “Well, we’ve been at this for 4 months straight, so yes. And quite frankly, I’m not sure what I’m going to do with myself when this is all over.”

However, we are now approaching the finish line. The charts go out tomorrow, with Big Brother arriving Monday to begin their three day stint. It’s the final countdown here folks, so keep checking in for more posts in the near future.


A look inside my alter ego March 13, 2009

We all live several lives at once, in the sense that we don’t act exactly the same at work as we do when we’re out with friends. (Or at least, I would hope not). That’s not to say that we are completely different people, but we do have to wear different masks, and act accordingly. 

For my job, I have to wear the mask of a clinician. Most people who know me personally never see this side, and I thought it might be fun to share a little snippet of what that “other side” of me is like.

The following is an excerpt from an email that went between 3 staff, myself included, about one of our folks who had recently seen the psychiatrist (for which I had been present). The psychiatrist mentioned after the client had left that instead of her diagnosis of schizoaffective disorder, perhaps she instead has Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD). (In accordance with all HIPPA and confidentiality regulations, any identifying info for all parties has been removed):

Staff A: Everything I have learned about BPD does not seem to apply to [client]. I am sincerely baffled by this. Please advise.

Staff B: I wouldn’t give her a BPD diagnosis; maybe a somatization disorder or conversion disorder.

Me: [The doctor] said that the symptoms she complains of are sometimes seen in individuals with BPD. In such cases many meds are tried, but since the origin of the illness is not organic, no meds are ever reported as being effective. This pretty sums up exactly what [client] reports.

I agree that there may be some sort of psychosomatic issues going on, and I would venture to guess that it could quite possibly run concurrent with a personality disorder diagnosis. I’m not saying that I firmly believe that [client] herself has BPD, but rather that generally it is possible to have both at the same time, and actually seems quite intuitive to the nature of both illnesses.

Staff B: I think it’s safe to say she demonstrates some traits of a personality disorder (not necessarily BPD). This can even be mentioned on Axis II: “Traits of personality disorder, including ____”.

(Note: If you want to know what any of the fancy words mean, click on it. I have linked to more info.)

Now, it’s not all work and no play between the hours of 8am and 4pm for little Miss Messie Jessie. Here’s an excerpt from an email exchange with one of the “higher ups” about my upcoming jury duty, and possibilities on how I could get out of being chosen for the jury:

Me: Maybe I could wear an old bridesmaid dress, have rat’s nest hair, with super thick eyeliner/mascara that’s all streaked down my face like I was just crying, and carrying a baby doll with it’s head ripped off”.

I think that’s a little more like the Jess you all know and love.


Quote of the Day February 20, 2009

Filed under: Masticate on this,Working hard or hardly working — Messie Jessie @ 2:45 pm
Tags: , , ,

“Men are weird. They have this weird…. men behavior.

A fellow female coworker, verbalizing her thoughts about men, during a conversation about relationships and not understanding the actions of the opposite sex.

I laughed pretty hard about this one. She was totally serious, and in the moment it made perfect sense. I hope it speaks to you all too.


Schadenfreude at its finest February 7, 2009

Schadenfreude = taking pleasure in the misfortune of others

In case you need a little more elaboration, here’s a song written about the phenomenon.


When I was 8 years old, my mom and I lived in this house that sat adjacent to a 45 degree curve in the road. When inclement weather would fall, that curve became an icy, treacherous mess. My mom and I would sit in front of our second floor window, drink our hot chocolate and watch as the cars would spin out and wreck in front of our house. It was my favorite winter-time activity.

Apparently, some guilty pleasures die hard… And are best enjoyed in the company of others.

On Tuesday into Wednesday of this week, Philadelphia got almost 8 1/2 inches of snow. The streets department is notorious for their poor response to snow, and thus did no salting nor subsequent plowing of minor arterial & local streets.

I work right next to one of these streets, which has a very, very small curve on it. It’s a one way street, so cars are accustomed to zooming down this road without a second thought. The caveat this week was that since the street had not been treated before or after the snow, this curve became covered in first slush, then ice. 

Each morning, as I rounded the corner to the street of my job, there was a cop car sitting in front of my office. The first day, my initial reaction was, “oh great, it’s not even 8am and someone’s in crisis”. In actuality, the cops were there to deal with the cars that were piling up on the other side of the curve. 

On both Thursday and Friday, we had a total of 12 accidents- that we witnessed. On Friday, we were privy to witness 6 cars slip out and hit either each other, or cars parked along the street, within the span of about a half hour.

What did we do about the problem? Yes, that’s right- we sat there and watched.  We also saw a few bicyclists slip out, and one man in a wheel chair take a spill (it’s ok to laugh. He got up and walked his wheelchair out of the road). And me specifically; what did I do? I broke out my camera phone… That’s right, I was the shutterbug voyeur. 

Finally, the cops decided it was in the best interest of all to close off the road. This was about the time I broke out my camera, so while I missed photo-ops for the really good action, here’s a little something to satiate your own voyeurism tendencies.


This guy was sitting the the parked white car

This guy was sitting in the parked white car when it got hit



Cops everywhere!

Cops everywhere!












This is the icy curve

This is the icy curve


More cop cars!

More cop cars!


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